Fidget Spinners

Fidget spinners are the most annoying things to happen since smoke detectors. But unlike fidget spinners, smoke detectors have a purpose.

All fidget spinners do are distract you and everyone around you from whatever it is you’re doing. They don’t relieve anxiety, they don’t help you focus, they’re not cool.

One say I was walking to first period and I passed Mrs.Ellis’s classroom and there was a paper sign that had a big no no mark ?(That’s the no no mark I don’t actually know what it’s called) and inside that big red no no mark it said “slime” now this was back in the first semester and obviously it’s a reasonable request. I walk by Mrs.Ellis’s room everyday on my way to first period and I see that she has carpet in her room. And slime being slime it would get everywhere and ruin the carpet. Now on the same trip to first period I walk by Mr.Vickers room and I see not one but TWO big red no no signs.

Inside the first of these big red no no signs it’s says “fidget spinners” and the other one said “fidget cubes.” If you were in his class you’d know that Mr.Vickers is a pretty chill guy, so someone must have really ticked him off for him to put up those signs. So I looked in to them and discovered the most annoying little noise makers to ever exist.

If you don’t know what a fidget spinner is then you live under a rock because they’re everywhere. It’s a little solid plastic object with three arms kinda like a pinwheel. In the end of each of these arms there’s a weight witch is what makes it spin. There are buttons on each side that you hold and when you wack one of the arms it spins. That’s it. That’s all it is nothing more.

These stupid things remind me of let rocks. It’s a simple idea, that makes people look stupid when they buy it, everyone buys it, and the guy who makes them bathes in your money while laughing at you because it looks like you have some sort of disability when you flick the little arm.

YOUTUBE THE ALL MIGHTY TREND CREATORS AND HORSE BEATERS also had idiots giving in to the trend doing tricks such as handing it from hand to another while it spins, spinning it from one of the arms instead of the middle, and the famous twirling it around with your fingers like people do with poker chips. The one video I enjoyed watching that had fidget spinners in it, is the one where they super glue razor blades to it. That’s original content right there.

It’s basically a child’s toy. I bet the guy who made these could make them but for babies to chew on and he’d make double the money he already makes. Only it would be a productive advancement in the future generations because babies need things to chew on while their teeth come in.

In conclusion fidget spinners are dumb, you look dumb when you use them, and they should make them for babies.

Fanta Orange Soda

Fanta Orange Soda is the best Fanta and the only type of Fanta that should even exist.

I love Fanta because it’s a cold fizzy drink that tastes like an orange. People drink orange juice at breakfast and that’s the only time orange juice is really acceptable unless it’s in a carton. But with Fanta you can drink it any time of the day and no matter what people won’t think you’re weird for drinking orange juice at noon in the middle of wither. All they’ll think about you is “what a fat neo Nazi slob.”

That was a joke.

But, Fanta did originated in Nazi germany because they couldn’t get Coke from the outside world because they didn’t want people smuggling in weapons to rebel on those giant coke trucks. After World War Two was over and Hitler was dead, Coke A Cola bought Fanta and made it their third soda after Sprite and the world famous Coke A Cola.

Two random thoughts; what do you call a group of gunna pigs and why do people think only elderly men like creamsickles?

Fanta is also good because it doesn’t have caffeine and none of the fake things grownups tell you about caffeine apply. It’s just pure fake orange flavor and dye so drink up kids.

Tater Tots

Tater tots are not French fries and never will be. The qualifications to be a French fry or just a fry are must be made of some form of potato and have to be in the general shape of a rectangle and has to be fried.

As you can see an tater tot meets only one of these expectations. The waffle fry is only considered a French fry because it’s got the French fry shape aka the waffle part is in rectangles. Tater tots are not French frys just like hot dogs are not sandwiches.

Teh tater tot is fried, and made of potatoes, but it’s not a rectangle. It’s a cylinder. I believe that the tater tot has another argument because it’s a tater TOT not a tater fry. All fries have to have the word “fry” in them. Actually I lied, they don’t HAVE to because Europeans call them chips.

That’s my argument to why tater tots aren’t French Fries.

My Future Job

When I grow up I want to be a sound person. That may sound weird and it is, and that’s because I have no idea what they’re actually called, sound engineers? I guess but that sounds a bit technical.

When I grow up I want to help with sound in movies and content and make music as well (maybe) I do happen to be writing this in band class. But that’s off topic, when I grow up I want to do sound editing and make movies and music have better quality with things like auto tune and other programs. I want to learn about microphones and speakers and all that kind of stuff.

I’ve learnt a few things on my own like just because it’s a expensive microphone doesn’t mean it’s a good one, Yeti is the Apple of microphones, by that I mean their merchandise is over priced for the quality if the microphone. I’ve learned that if you’ve done a good job no one will notice. You could have the best lyrics to a song or the most original story line and it could be totally amazing but then you hear their crapy mic quality or you can hear their breaths and lip smack. There’s a lot of tiny details that can cause big irritations if they are noticed.

What’s the point of working if it’s effortless? Sound design, or engineering or whatever it’s called, is not effortless at all. It takes some level of skill to understand the program you’re using and what to change. Music creators don’t record all of their music in one go, but if they do it makes your job easier. If they record in segments like most of them do, they’ll typically record music, lyrics, then ask you to shove it all together into the track. But I don’t know all of the fore good music producers do it differently.

Anyway that’s what I want to be when I’m older for my mom or who ever actually cared enough to read this.

TF2

TF2, if you don’t know, is an abbreviation of Team Fortreas Two (I promise it’s less cringeworthy than it sounds). Team Fortress Two is a game where a team of twelve different people pick from nine different classes (I’ll get to that later,) to complete an objective that another team is trying to maintain for a time period, the attacking team can get extra time by getting checkpoints.

The nine classes. First of all there are groups of classes. The three grouped are offensive, defensive, and support. The offensive consists of three classes, scout, soldier, and pyro. Scout is the fastes of all nine classes. He’s from Boston, and he uses a scattergun to basically annoy people and keep them distracted. He also has the lowest health so he’s quite venerable to everyone except spy and sniper (more on them later).

The next offensive class is soldier. He uses a rocket launcher that holds 4 rockets at a time. He’s the second slowest class, and from America. The player can do a thing called rocket jumping to move quickly across the map to help capture, or defend a point. Rocket jumping is not a button you press and actually takes skill and a basic knowledge of how the source engine works (the source engine is the game engine that apples physics to the game so that things like rocket jumping can exist. Soldier also has a moderate amount of health.

The third class and final offensive class is pyro. Pyro uses a flamethrower to light his foes on fire slowly draining their health so they either have to run away or are eayser to finish off for his or her other team mates. A fun fact about the pyro, his gender is undefined and no one knows what it is because “it” wears a gas mask. Also he sees the world as a magical place where there is nothing but happiness and love witch is called “pyroland”. The flamethrower it uses also has a compression blast witch juts out a large powerful puff of hot air that can knock foes back and reflect protections such as rockets from soldier and grenades from demoman. Pyro’s origin is unknown.

The next group, defense, consists of demoman, heavy, and engineer. Demoman is and African-Scotsman who uses a grenade launcher to hurl grenades that will explode if they hit a person but won’t if they hit the ground first. Like the soldier, demoman can also do a special jump, not with rockets, but with stickybombs. Granted this is more dangerous and takes less skill it’s still tons of fun. Oh yea demoman has a sticky bomb launcher as well. (I didn’t mention the other classes secondary and mele weapons because they’re kind of boring and most are just pistols or shotguns. Also the mele weapons are like a bat an axe a broken bottle, a shovel, stuff like that). Demoman is defensive because of his stickybomb launcher, he can put stickbombs on points so that when people run onto them he can blow them up.

Heavy. Heavy is short for “Heavy Weapons Guy”. Heavy is a hulking Russian man hailing from the soviet unuion, he uses a minigun (not a mini gun, a minigun aka a huge gun not a super small gun) he named his gun Sasha, as you do, and keeps it in very good condition. The rounds he uses cost $2000 American to fire for twelve seconds. If you’re wondering why I’m going into such detail, it’s because Heavy is my favorite class. Heavy has the largest hit–box of all the classes, is the slowest of all the classes, and I’m pretty sure least played of all classes, he also has the most health of all the classes. He’s defensive because of his limitations to mobility.

Engineer or engy for short. Engy is from bee cave Texas yes the place near here but you won’t be meeting him anytime soon because all the events of TF2 take place in the sixties. He’s a defensive class because he builds a sentry gun, it has three stages. In the first stage, the gun has a single barrel and shoots at a slow–ish pace, the second stage of the gun ,after being upgraded by hitting it with a wrench several times, has two long miniguns attached to the sides, the third form is basically the second form only it shoots four rockets. The engy has other buildings too. He can build a dispenser witch can heal teammates and give out ammo as well. Lastly he can build a teleport to bring teammates back to the front lines quickly and is especially helpful when you have slower classes on your team.

The final group, support, consists of three classes as do the others, but two of witch are not very helpful.

The medic. The medic is German and the second fastest class. He, as you may have guessed, heals people. But not in the way a normal medic would, Medic uses a medigun to heal people. He points it at someone who has low health and they’re health goes up rapidly, hence the name medic. After the medic heals a certain amount with his medigun, he has this thing called an Über charge rendering the healing target invulnerable. This can change the tides of games and is great for getting rid of sentry guns.

The nest class, sniper, isn’t always very helpful but can help if the person playing can hit their shots. Sniper is from New Zealand but grew up in Australia. For years he was confused about why he never wanted to grow up and wrestle crocodiles for a livening or never grew a mustache, or chest hair in the shape of Australia. Anyway, as you may have guessed sniper uses a sniper rifles and is one of the more sane mercenaries. His sniper rifle does critical hits of he hits his targets head (critical hits are hits that deal more damage) and the longer you stay scoped in the more your charge meter goes up. The charge meter when full can deal 200 damage, almost enough to one–shot any class. A fully charged headshot can kill a full health heavy.

And finally last and certainly least is spy. Spy is a Frenchman hailing from France. As you may have guessed he is a jerk. People who play spy are jerks. Spy has a single use and that is to “sap” sentrys. A snapper is a device that disables and destroys things engy built. It takes a bit to destroy the sentry but it can disable it long enough for the rest of your team to destroy it. But engy can just hit it with a wrench a few times and it’ll go away. Spy can also disguise as players on the other team and sneak up behind them to backstab them. A backstab is where spy pulls out a butterfly knife and, well, stabs them in the back. The butterfly knife is the only insta–kill weapon in the whole game. Spy can also go invisible for a short amount of time. When spy is disguised as an person on the other team he can be bumped into and not phase through like a normal person. He also has a revolver witch is basically a pistol with six shots.

The situation that the mercs are in is actually quite grim. They’re in a never ending turf war employed by two idiot brothers who convinced their dad to buy a large part of New Mexico covered in gravel and random buildings. But they wear funny hats so it’s all okay.

 

The Pixar Theory

SPOILER ALERT! GO WATCH ALL THESE MOVIES THE’RE GREAT!

The Pixar theory is the theory that all of the movies that Disney Pixar has made are all connected or in the same universe. I’m sure I won’t be able to explained it that well but I will try

This theory starts out with the three Easter Eggs that are in (I think) every movie, those being the Ball from Toy Story, the pizza planet truck, and one more I can’t think of now but will probably mention later on. These Easter Eggs are, somewhat, proof that they’re all in the same universe.

You may be thinking that this is impossible because Pixar made movies such as Cars and WallE and those can’t be blah blah. I never said they were in the same time as each other. In Pixar movies there are the main races I guess you could say. Machines, Humans, and Animals. Another key component is evolution. The Cars movie and monsters ink are in the future and the characters are the way they are because if evolution. The humans evolved and adapted into the monsters from Monsters ink who as we know need the scream’s from children to power their world, the doors they go through are portals back in time so they can gather energy from there due to lack of children in their current time.

Years from then when there IS no more scream energy left, or something, the monsters start to adapt and evolve into, guess what? CARS. And that’s as far into the future the timeline goes.

Like I said the Easter eggs are a main component to this theory. The more modern timed movies, like inside out, Finding Nemo/Dory,and Toy Story are connected. In one scene in finding dory we can see through the glass and see Riley who is from inside out. Keep in mind they WERE in SanFrancisco where Riley lives further proving that they are in fact in the same time (at least those movies are) also the guy who voices fear in inside out ALSO voices the fish in the “somewhat near beginning” that’s just Disney being lazy as always but I’m getting off topic. I’m sorry about not being able to include the toy story bit but I don’t think that happened in the same year as this because one Andy’s mom let her baby ride in the front seat which parents today would never do and he’s in college.

No we move on to the past movies and this is where it gets juicy. Brave, remember that movie, remember the old lady who gives Marada the stuff she feeds to her mom. Well obviously she’s a witch and witches do magic blah blah blah. So anyway there is one sculpture in her “wood shop” that resembles Sully. She wouldn’t take the time to carve that if she, one didn’t know what it was or two, had a bond with him. Leading me to believe that she, the crazy old witch lady, is boo (the little girl from monsters ink). So! Here’s where it gets reaaaly good. She (boo) was to young to fully remember what exactly happened. So she learns magic and uses the same magic used to power the doors to go looking for her long lost friend Sully or “Kitty” as she knows him.

Thats about it I would talk about the good dinosaur but I haven’t seen it.

Austin Texas Breakfast

Austin Texas is the capital of the glorious state of Texas. And if you didn’t know that now you do. You should know because the only people who actually read my posts are FROM HERE.

Austin Texas, named after Stephan f Austen who fought agents Mexico blah blah blah. So many people know that to the point that it’s boring and no one really cares. I’m sure I could tell you all about the Texan revolution but I’ll let the people the school pays to tell you that, tell you about it.

Anyway, down town Austin is so hipster-like that I think we should legally declare it as a separate country from the us. You can’t go half a block downtown without seeing a cafe serving breakfast, someone eating breakfast regardless of what time it is, or someone ranting about how they eat vegan sausage and fruit for breakfast.

Austin is know by Texans and maybe some other people for two things, live music, and breakfast tacos. I could have made a pot joke but i didn’t. Sometimes both in the same spot at the same time. Breakfast tacos are what Austinites wake up for. It’s like a reason to live. And they are good. As long as you know what to put on them. One of the things you never put on a BREAKFAST taco (not normal tacos) is peppers. You can put pepper or salsa on a breakfast taco but not peppers. Because their messy and cold and it doesn’t go well with eggs.

Okay being honest right now I just wanted to write this to talk about breakfast tacos. Here’s what you put in a breakfast taco if you really want to enjoy it. Cheese, more cheese, salsa, scrambled eggs THEY CAN NOT BE COLD (the eggs), bacon, bacon, pepper, and finally use a flour tortilla, a breakfast taco is only as good as its tortilla.

So yea… breakfast.

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Okay I just pasted the title and I wasn’t sure what I had copied before so there you go it’s a lobster.

I love these faces and there are a plentiful of them out there like these ones. ┻━┻ ︵ヽ(`Д´)ノ︵ ┻━┻ 。◕‿‿◕。

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(⌐■_■) and finally ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ and | (• ◡•)| (❍ᴥ❍Ʋ) as you can see loads of fun and this is what my blog has come to.

Shorts During Winter

The title speaks for its self. WHO WEARS SHORTS DURING WINTER! I understand that they’re comfortable even during winter but do people have to wear them when it’s 31 DEGREES!

I was at the buss stop the other day and I get there. I’m wearing a jacket long steves anda hoodie as well as warm pants yea. I’m shivering like a washing machine with a brick in it along with some other boys that come to the same bus stop (duh) and tow girls show up BOTH WEARING SHORT SHORTS! I’m just there, thinking “what are you” they don’t even look cold. One of them didn’t even have long sleeves. AND THAT WAS THE YOUNGER ONE!

So I turn to my friends and say “you guys see this right? The cold isn’t making me see things?” And they look over and look back at me and they look shocked. They couldn’t let their jaws hang open because it was so cold! Their teeth kept chattering. As I was saying these girls didn’t even look cold. They were just in their phones la de da like children weren’t starving in Africa. Wrong topic. Like children weren’t freezing next to them.

Im perfectly okay with slow and painful suicide. But at least let us not hate you WHILE your doing it.

Christmas

Christmas (as you may know) is a happy time of year pretty much lasting through October 1st to December 25. The reason I say that is because of stores. Stores try to cram Christmas down our throats when we’re still not sure what to be for Halloween. Don’t get me wrong I love Christmas and all it has to offer.

If Christmas were to smell like something it would smell like peppermint and Christmas tree branches. If Christmas was to sound like something it would sound like bells, laughter, and tuba music. If Christmas felt like something it would feel like soft blankets, and warmth from a fire or snow.

Belive it or not, some people have a day of snow and the next day it’s still there and there unhappy. I understand there point of view, but if we had more than a day of snow in Texas, no one would complain. Sure the city would still be shutdown but it would be cool.

Notice how, in Austin, it rains up until a week or two before Christmas then it stops? It’s like the universe gives us a break form all the rain. Or it’s too cold to rain but too warm to snow.

Anyway Texan winters suck.