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Open Letter to IT

IT, I think your a cool guy and all, but the children… why eat the children? I’ll give you three reasons that you should eat adult instead of children.


  1. Adults have more juicy juicy meat. The average adult weight in North America being 80.7 kg (177.9 lb) and then with the average North American child(around 10 years old) weighing 30.8 kg (68lb) you can get over twice the meat. Plus adults gain more muscle mass than children. With more muscle mass comes more juicy delicious tender meat. With all that good good meat in you, your little 27 year catnaps can definitely last longer, and you’ll sleep better too.
  2. Adults can have fear too. Not only kids can have fear. You know you don’t have to be a clown. You can turn into unpaid bills, incomplete taxes, or even something so cruel as a bank account in debt. If you pulled this off I know you’d scare the bejeezus out of my mom or dad. Think of how much fear you could obtain. Plus the screams… oh the screams. They would be wondrous! So loud, so fulfilling, so stellar.
  3. Adults are easier to catch. Think of this. A small child scared out of his or her mind. They run the other direction and right as you touch the little striped shirt of theirs, they crawl under a stupid fence and get away. Wow. What a let down.  If that was adult you would have had yourself a nice red hamstring or tender humerus. Plus adults tend to be more socially active then children. That means that you can have a steak party at Dave’s house.


That’s my case as why I think you should go after adults and stop eating those small, fast, arrogant creatures kids are.


P.S. I only wrote this to say that THE CHILDREN ARE MINE, LEAVE THEM TO ME.

The Coroner Part 2 of 2

Once the young, fit, school hottie got to the morgue they started taking blood tests,

”that’s weird. His blood… It’s switching between O positive and O negative on the monitor. Probably just the system.”

He then went on to do a body search,

”large truama on the ribs. Small strikes on the back. Yep this looks like a big fall.”

time flew like a jet plane across the sky. Lunch… dinner then close up shop and go to bed. Something felt wrong with that boy there though,

”I mean he did die. And it is my first patient at the new office.”

He poured himself a glass of his 2-liter Dr.Pepper. But tonight he was tired after sitting at the computer for a while so he didn’t stay up to watch Family Feud and instead went to bed at 9:00.

The next morning he woke up in grumps and groans. Stevens back always hurts when he has more than normal of computer time. When he got to work he sat down and stared at the door that lay behind hold the body.

Suddenly he got his head twisted twice around by a large cockroach like monster. Then the soul gets sucked out of Steven. And the monster is now Stevens body.

The Coroner, Part 1 of 2

“Welcome, and thanks for joining Massachusetts Institute of Technology Hospital morgue staff. We hope you’re around for a while. I’ll tell you, we’ve been looking for someone with a… certain expertise,” a nice sounding tour guide said.

“Thanks, I guess?” a brown haired man with a goatee that looked like it was just cleanly shaved said questionably.“Okay, let’s get to work, Joseph,” he mumbled to himself as he slowly stepped into the echoing, chilling and eerie morgue.

He had worked in these death facilities for 8 years but this one felt just a tad different.”possibly a bit cooler I suppose,” he said as a chill ran down his back like a cool river flowing rapidly through a canyon.”sink over here, latex gloves over there. Looks pretty similar to me. Ready to get started tomorrow,”

Joseph went back home that night. Bags around his eyes, slumped over and immediately put on that nice terry cloth robe he got on his trip to Vegas in 2010. He got a glass of Dr.Pepper, watched the 10:00 Family Feud and then went to sleep.

The next morning he got up put on his new Red and Black button down shirt with a MIT logo on the pocket, and some khakis. He got his Prius hybrid and headed to school. He got into the morgue and then went to his office. He sat down in his new leather chair and IKEA Mickey desk and let out a large sigh.

”Beep. Mr. Slayder we need you in the front entrance closest to the hospital. Beep.”

” Okay,” he said as he stood up and stretched his back,” Let’s get going with this,” he starting jogging to the front of the building getting progressively faster. “What do we got?”

” Steven Johnson. Freak helicopter or airplane incident. Found in a small piece of forest just east of here. Confirmed deceased.”

How To Ruin A Relationship in 5 Easy Steps

Read more: How To Ruin A Relationship in 5 Easy Steps

Shadow man, Part 4

“Dad?” Richie said with the most confused look on his face.

“I needed to hide out for a little while. I was on the biggest hitmen in the worlds list. Top order. I was ex seal team six. Once I left after 12 years in service I felt something was wrong. A hit man. He had been looking for me because I had exploded a illegal arms dealer three months before I left the military. I had hired a look alike to take you after I bought you ice cream. He willfully knew he was going to die for me. He was a great colleague.”

“I’m shocked.” Richie quietly said. “ I’m at a loss for words”


“Run.” His dad says right before…

Splat! Blood goes everywhere with a bullet strait through Richies dads brain.

When Richie gets home he tells his mom about every.

“It was dad. He he’s here…bu but he he got shot. Blood everywhere!”

Richie got traumatized and went to a mental hospital for 32 years. Nobody knows if he was really telling the truth.

Phantom’s Lair Description

A pond. A small pond in the way of a rocky island inside this desolate cavern of despair. Fog lifelessly sits in place on this dreadful puddle of misery. A broken oar prancing in the ripples of the mossy, muggy waters. A small hickory row boat only big enough for two. Fallen rock from the ceiling makes craters on the dirt ground. Water trickling down every stalagmites above.

A cell. It looks like it was used before but now no signs of life are near. Inside the cell a rickety steel bed with three legs has a very old mattress sits upon ice cold pavement. A throne made out of scraps and pieces of suede and fabric. A base made of a rock, steel and a old rocking chair. On the throne are a mask and cloak.

A knife. A old rusted knife with a layer of dried blood crusted over the edge of the knife. But the look of it knew that when it was used it was kept clean as a whistle.

There is one more thing a music box. But there was something very strange. It didn’t have a scratch on it. It was in perfect shape.

The Girl, Part 4

Even with a lot of food and caffeine in me I somehow couldn’t keep myself awake in class. When I was in english class though I was especially tired. Every time my teacher Mrs.Teller Would ramble, ramble, ramble. My head would fall down the back side of my arm. Less and less supported by it. Until I slumped over on my desk, asleep.

Rapidly something popped into my head It was a “white dream.” A vision in my head that showed a cart slowly rolling down a pearl hallway. My mind was telling me it was a tough place. A place you didn’t want to be in.

”WHACK!” A yard stick smacks down on my desk with a roaring crack.

”Wake up! We don’t make time for sleeping. DO WE!” Mrs.teller didn’t have the best reputation for being the nicest teacher. But I didn’t say a word to her ever after that. When I got home I felt sick. And not like common cold sick. I felt mentally sick. My mind felt like it needed to vomit something. Something bad.

If I Could Have One Super Power

We have all heard the question at least once “ If you could have one super power what would it be?” I wanted to answer this question so that my audience(you) and myself can all think about this question.

For me personally I would want the power to control nature.

the phenomena of the physical world collectively, including plants, animals, the landscape, and other features and products of the earth, as opposed to humans or human creations.

I chose this power because well I love nature and It has a lot of possibilities. For one it would be awesome to show your friend that you can control their dog to bark the happy birthday on their birthday. Or if you wanted to be super duper helpful you could make every plant to it’s best ability. Which in turn would supply the world with the good stuff. Oxygen.

Please share in the comments what your super power would be. Thanks for reading.

The Shadow Man, Part 3

Richie will remembered that moment for the rest of his life. For that was the most traumatic moment of his life… so far. To kill is to stand in front of someone and take their life away. Richie knew this as one of the most important lessons he will ever learn.

Richie ditches his last class because he knew there was a substitute. He walked down to the abandoned building grabbing a couple different size rocks and storing them in his backpack. He wanted vengeance on his father’s death.

The day was cold as he made his way to the building. A shiver running down his spine. When he made it to the building he was petrified of walking in. As soon as he stepped in the door he cold smell the smell of dust and rotting dry wall. His shaking body walked slowly and quietly throughout the building holding rocks in each hand. He knew that he would have to find the courage in him to lift a one thousand pound boulder to even be able to get close to that wretched monster.

He walks into a small room and behold… there is a man. A man with black hair with white roots.

”D-d-d-did you kill my father!?”

”No I did not,”he had a slight  grin on his face.

”Then who are you?”

”I am your father,”he said with a chuckle.


”Let me explain.”

My Hero’s Journey(fictional)

My hero’s journey

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