May 11

How to Fail Seventh Grade

7th grade is not as easy as it looks. Brooke and I thought of some tips to help you through the year. Here’s some advice from the best people with the most experience.

1- Time Management
If you’re assigned homework, NEVER do it right away. Always wait until 12:00 pm the night before. Whether it is an easy worksheet or an important project, wait until the last minute! just procrastinate!

2- Tests
Whenever you take a test, always choose the wrong answer. If it’s a bubble sheet, make patterns! If it’s a written test, do the right work, but write the wrong answer. If possible, skip all the days of school that you have tests! This way you can fail all your tests!

3- Friends
If you have any friends, LOSE THEM IMMEDIATELY! They won’t help you at all in your lifetime. Become a loner and sit in the back corner of the classroom. Don’t make eye contact with anybody so you don’t have to socialize! You will be much better off without friends.

4- Locker
Have the messiest locker ever so you always turn up to class unprepared. Just stuff everything in your locker so you can’t find anything. This way you won’t have to deal with carrying your supplies from class to class. Your teachers will be so delighted when you show up empty handed.

5- Teachers
Whenever a teacher asked a question, always raise your hand and say the wrong answer! Or try to ask unrelated questions to stall class. Remember to make loud annoying noises during a lesson, like pencil tapping, whistling, and foot stomping. Your teachers will adore you!

Follow these steps and you will definitely ace your 7th grade year.

April 28

Swim Team

The Lake Hills Splashers swim team just began again this week. My favorite thing to do is swim! And the best part is, lots of my friends are on my team. This year marks my sixth year on this team. So far we have only done some technique practice to remind our forgetful brains of how to do each stroke perfectly. We have worked on freestyle, backstroke, and breaststroke; not butterfly which is my favorite. We always end the practice with some races and relays.

My coaches are amazing, they are the same ones as last year. They will have to miss our biggest meet of the year to go to the Olympic Trials. One of them, Coach Steve, works at my school as a health and athletics teacher. The other one, Coach Alison, has had surgery on both of her shoulders from swimming for over fifteen years.

The inter squad meet is next Friday, but I’m not sure what events I want to try yet. My younger sister is also on my team but she is in a different age group. She used to hate butterfly, but after this weeks practice it has become her favorite.

April 14

The Dog

Her body was muscular
And golden
And soft,
And as she stood up
She stared,
And with a long tail
That was wagging
In happiness
And a tongue of bright pink,
And a nose of dark black,
And eyes of light brown,
Big and loving and open.
Then out of the corner,
With that soft gold coat
Walking without a sound
Paw
After paw
She walked
Fluffy, golden, soft,
Part eagle, part cat,
Part neither–for she was a dog

-The Dog
By: Me

Poem inspired by: The shark by Edward John Pratt

April 8

Poem

George, Who Played with a Dangerous Toy, and Suffered a Catastrophe of Considerable Dimensions

        When George’s Grandmamma was told
        That George had been as good as gold,
        She promised in the afternoon
        To buy him an Immense BALLOON.
        And so she did; but when it came,
        It got into the candle flame,
        And being of a dangerous sort
        Exploded with a loud report!
        The lights went out! The windows broke!
        The room was filled with reeking smoke.
        And in the darkness, shrieks and yells
        Were mingled with electric bells,
        And falling masonry and groans,
        And crunching, as of broken bones,
        And dreadful shrieks, when, worst of all,
        The house itself began to fall!
        It tottered, shuddering to and fro,
        Then crashed into the street below –
        Which happened to be Savile Row.
        When help arrived, among the dead.
        Were Cousin Mary, Little Fred,
        The Footmen (both of them), the Groom,
        The man that cleaned the Billiard-Room,
        The Chaplain, and the Still-Room Maid.
        And I am dreadfully afraid
        That Monsieur Champignon, the Chef,
        Will now be permanently deaf –

    And both his aides are much the same;While George, who was in part to blame,Received, you will regret to hear,A nasty lump behind the ear.

    Moral:
    The moral is that little boys
    Should not be given dangerous toys.

    -Hilaire Belloc

     

    I think that this poem shows how a simple accident can turn into a tragic catastrophe. I love how this poem uses rhyme at the end of every sentence. I can almost never make any of my sentences rhyme. It is also cool how much detail is put into just a few lines of explaining what happened to the house and the people in it.

     m

    April 1

    Three Austin Attractions

    Whether you live in Austin, are visiting family, or just needed a vacation, these three places have amazing things to see and do.

     

    saloncomidas fer bolaño via Compfight

    AUSTIN PANIC ROOM-

    Austin Panic Room is a wonderful place to spend time with friends and family. You get locked in a room and solve puzzles and follow clues to find your way out!

     

    Falkenluster Allee Geerd-Olaf Freyer via Compfight

    Commons Ford-

    Wanting to get outside? Well this is the place to be! At Commons Ford you can run, walk, and bike. There are many trails and a large field at the end. Dogs are welcome to come too!

     

    Skyline, Treeline, Austin Cesar Garza via Compfight

    Zilker Park-

    In downtown Austin Zilker Park is found. With stunning views, a beautiful lake, and wonderful hiking trails, a day out will be amazing! Swimming, kayaking, and walking will be fun for the whole family at this park.

     

     

     

    March 3

    Adventures of a Unicorn

    One day you wake up, and by your bed is a creature. You don’t know what it is or where you are, but you remain calm. It speaks in a soothing voice saying “I am Majestica queen of cloudland, the land of unicorns.” So it speaks. That’s nice, but how do I get out of here? “Where am I?” You say to Majestica. “You have been selected to train and eventually become a unicorn.” Woah. “That is awesome! Again, Where am I?” “You’ll find out soon enough.” Slightly lowering her voice.

    You wake up in a completely white room with bright lights. It looks like a surgeons operating room. How long was I out? You remember Majestica and bring your hand up to your head. Oh. No. I am a unicorn. You spot a mirror across the room and run to it. Immediately the floor finds your face. Try again. Slowly this time. Dragging yourself across the room takes an eternity, cold floor, bright light, clean room. As you stare at your face in the mirror it looks exactly like the one your dreams from when you were six years old with rosy cheeks, a rainbow horn, and soft fur.

    Majestica walks in and sees you. “Like the new look?” This is my chance. you lunge for a scalpel on the table next to you, but your too slow. She pins what is now your hoof to the table and says “What exactly were you planning on doing with that?” All you do in response is kick her in the shin and run. Out of the door is a maze of hallways of bright lights. You see an exit far down the hallway. I’m so much faster at running now! You race out the door and up the hill. Now what? Seeing a pond in the distance you sprint towards it and jump in.

    You wake up back in bed, in your house, with your sister pouring water on your face.

    It was just a dream…

    February 11

    The Darkness

    Coming home tired from work, you walk up the steps to the front door of your house. You pull your key from out of your pocket and push it into the lock. Click. The door is open. It all seems like a normal day, the normal sky, the normal temperature, every thing is normal. But when you take the key out of the door it swings open without you pushing it. What, this isn’t very normal. Suddenly a strong force is pulling you in like a vacuum.

    Your feet slightly raise above the ground and you are pulled forwards. A bit like what you see in the cartoons when there is a ghost. You are dragged towards your couch. Struggling just makes the grip tighter. You are dropped in your living room and a voice bellows
    “Sit.”
    You can move again, and you think about running. Now that’s not a good idea, but you try anyway.

    You get absolutely nowhere and give back in to the power. Obediently you sit down. Seconds after, the couch falls away and you are falling with it. Into the abyss, into the darkness, into the nothingness. There is a light below you and a cold, hard concrete floor. Oh no. This is where it ends isn’t it? Is this what it feels like, seconds before your doom? You close your eyes hoping it will all go away.

    It doesn’t.

    You hit the ground. Hard. Pain rips through your body. You scream for help, but no one can hear you. Stuck, helpless, and broken. Realizing that you aren’t going to move any time soon you start wondering. What did I do to deserve this? Why me? Just normal things you wonder when something bad happens. Then the voice comes back again. “You disturbed the great spirt. You shall pay for your stupidity.” What great spirit? What’s going on? You blurt out ” You’ve got the wrong person, I haven’t done anything.” Yes you have, well at least you will soon, and if you are here you can’t do it.” Your brain has stopped trying to comprehend what’s going on, and you fall asleep.

    February 4

    The Creature Behind the Wall

    One day as you were cleaning you realize that part of the wall is peeling. Confused you attempt to look the the hole but it’s to dark. You gently peel away the wall. As you do you realize that you are staring at a huge iron door. The wall is quickly being torn down by your curiosity. Soon the handle to the door is visible. But you notice something peculiar.

    There are claw marks around it.

    Do you dare continue?

    You do and attempt to turn the handle, but it’s locked. Frantically searching for a clue, hoping you don’t have to give up now. YES!! You scream with excitement. There is a riddle on the wall. It reads:

    look behind you
    This next clue
    In red and in blue.

    What? You turn around and see nothing unusual. Wait! You remember! When you were younger you had a monster doll that was red and blue. Sitting on your shelf, blankly staring, there it is. As you pick it up you see something that you have never noticed before.

    A zipper.

    In the pocket is a key! You run over to the door bursting with excitement and nervous energy. The key fits, a turn and the door swings open. A black darkness engulfs you, a chilling scream pulses through you, a large hand grabs you. You are searching for a switch. Your finger runs over it and flips it up. A blinding light comes from above. That’s when you see what has the deathly grip on your arm.

    It is a larger version of the red and blue monster with the same zipper on the back. You unzip the back and inside is a human…

    “Thank you for freeing me, I have been stuck in here for many years. Stuck because all of the kids that used to play with me have all shoved me in drawers and corners. But you, you have freed me from my prison so thank you.”

    You are still to shocked to even speak, so all you respond with is a blank stare…

    January 29

    The Phantom’s Lair

    Walking through the old opera house you want to see if the legend is true. On the stage the trapdoor is still open.

    You trip.

    Down, down you fall with an ear piercing screech.

    Splash! Still traumatized you hurry through the sticky liquid, this can’t be water! When you get to shore your eyes focus and another scream falls out of your mouth. You were swimming in a soup of blood and body parts.

    There was no way out, so on with your adventure. A giant barred gate stood tall in front of you. Past the gate you could see jewelry, clothing, and a distorted mannequin. As you raise the iron bars, the mannequin comes to life, hissing, warning, pointing. Where is it pointing?

    The throne…

    Just as you realize this, you hear laughter emerging from the abyss behind you. You spin around and there he is…

    The Phantom…

    “Found my lair have we now?” Exclaimed the Phantom. “This is my collection of possessions of my victims.”” You see that ring on your finger that is what I will take from you.”

    You run. But it’s pointless…

    January 18

    Masks

    People use masks in many ways. Sometimes covering your face just isn’t what you want. Maybe you just don’t want to show people what your true personality looks like.

    Some people wear actual masks made of various materials such as wood, plastic, paper, makeup, and other things. These masks can be for health, religion, beauty or just because the wearer is not comfortable with their appearance. People also wear other masks that aren’t physical masks. Theses masks are for covering up who you really are. For example if all of your friends love the color pink, but you dislike it you may say you like pink just to fit in. The main reason they do this is because they feel like if they don’t agree or fit in they will be judged.

    In conclusion think of if you’ve ever thought that you have to change how you really are or how you look just to fit in. Think of how hard it is to pretend to be a different person around certain people. Now before you exclude people for wearing or not wearing a “mask” think about how they are doing it because they may be afraid.